1、 我偷偷把同桌手机里我的号码名称改成了“爸爸”。上课时发短信给他：孩子赶紧回来吧，咱家中了一千万，还上鸡毛个学！同桌看了以后直接撒腿就往外跑，班主任问他干嘛去！他头也不回地说：“滚你泥马勒戈壁的！ ”
I secretly changed the name of my number in the phone at the same table to "Dad". Send a text message to him during class: Come back quickly, my child has 10 million in our family, and I have to go to school! After watching the same table, he threw his legs and ran out, and the head teacher asked him why he was going! Without looking back, he said, "Get out of the Gobi!"
2、 新来的校长，抓学风很紧，自称心理咨询师，欢迎各位同学去找他开导心理。一二货同学去找校长了，说：“校长，我早恋了，怎么办？” 校长特和蔼的说：“同学，别急，慢慢说，来，把你的名字和班级写下来。” 第二天，那个二货就被处分了…
The new principal, who is very tight on his style of study, claims to be a psychological counselor, and welcomes all students to come to him for psychological counseling. Yi Erhuo went to the principal and said, "Principal, I'm in a premature love, what should I do?" The principal said kindly: "Students, don't worry, speak slowly, come and write down your name and class." The next day, the second guy was punished...
3、 去超市，在饼干区碰到了一哭着挑选饼干的小萝莉和她老爸，对话如下。 老爸：你喜欢谁？ 萝莉哭着说：周杰伦。 老爸：喜欢周杰伦管个屁用啊，他又不能给你买饼干。 萝莉哭着说：你给我买饼干，我也喜欢周杰伦。 他老爸无语，我憋到内伤！现在的孩子啊！！！
When I went to the supermarket, I ran into a little Lolita and her dad who were picking biscuits crying in the biscuit section. The conversation is as follows. Dad: Who do you like? Lori cried and said: Jay Chou. Dad: I like Jay Chou to take care of his ass. He can't buy you biscuits. Lori cried and said: You buy me cookies, I also like Jay Chou. His father was speechless, and I was suffering from internal injuries! The child now! ! !
My friend works in a courier company, and the one who picks up the courier one day is a monk
He asked the master: "What's in the package"
The monk said it was a scripture, and my friend sighed and said: "Technology is advanced, and all the scriptures are obtained by express delivery."
A few days ago, I saw a boy in school uniform making a call with a loud voice, "How many times have I said it! We! Break up! I'm in 2000! You're in 98! It's the last century! Do you understand! Old woman! You are not for me! Don't bother me! "I'm holding my ID card when I hear this My hands are violent. It turns out I was from the last century. . .